BBQ

I sometimes think about fate. Why do children die? Why do some live and others don’t? Why was I born with this condition? Is everything in this universe truly as random as some say? Are we guided by something unseen, by fate? If so, I’m not sure I understand the concept. I do know one thing though, I was born and I am here. Heh, sometimes I wonder though, what if one of the others eggs were chosen? Would this egg become s normal boy? Maybe. It’s a foolish thought. I shouldn’t start going down that road again. I’m here, I’ve been here for 24 years now and I intend to stay for many years to come. Fate willing.

I was invited to a family barbecue by my uncle, the large man with the heart of gold. He has a large flat property and everything on one floor. It’s a perfect house for me! My grandfather was there as well, about 85 years old now. I had not seen him in a long time now; he’s too frail to visit me anymore sadly. Time is a strange thing. Every time I see him he’s aged so much. He made his way towards me, on short, unsteady steps. He finds support in his cane as he leans in to give me a hug. I could see the tears in the old man’s eyes, he misses his grandson. It’s not often I’ve seen him cry, he’s always been so tough, former policeman and everything. It was a bit overwhelming and I was unsure whether to cry as well or comfort him. I settled on the second option, but it was all very touching.

This man used to drive me to kindergarten, school, and watch over me and my sister when our parents were away. I owe him my utmost respect and admiration. Sure, he’s been a strange guy as well; he can say the craziest things. My mother usually gets annoyed by her father’s many outbursts, but I just laugh it off. He’s old, if he wants to be an original I say let him. I brought an assistant to the barbecue and to her my grandfather turns and says; “We have an agreement, him and I… If he dies first I’ll speak in his funeral, and if I die first he’ll speak in mine”. He’s been saying this for maybe about ten years now, but I want to honor this request. I’ll speak for his memory, as I’ll never forget him.

There were several others at the party, my grandmother, cousins and everything. My sister brought her boyfriend, they seem very happy together. As the evening progressed it was time for fun and games. We played croquet in the garden; this resulted in a lot of laughter, especially when my mother took the field! She’s probably one of the funniest people I know, she spreads joy when she’s in a good mood. I was on her team and even though we lost I had an amazing time. I think my mother and I can agree on one point. You don’t have to win as long as you’re having a good time.

For a few moments it was like stepping into a typical American neighborhood; a large barbecue, a warm social atmosphere, games in the garden and in the corner of my eyes I could see an American football flying. My cousins were tossing it about, just like you’d expect. I found it fascinating and enjoyable. Guess living by an army base run by Americans you’re bound to get affected somehow. They spent several years on one down in Germany. I was of course concerned about my breathing machine as this was the first real trip with the new one. This time however I was prepared! I made sure to recharge every chance I got, even brought some food of my own. I killed two birds with one stone and as mentioned before in this blog, I always need to plan ahead, be prepared.

As we were driving home my father remembered something vital! We had forgotten my food device; I’ll just call it that. It pretty much is a pump, pumping liquid food into my feeding tube. It’s practical for me as chewing gets tiresome. It has changed my life as I was near starvation in the past, skin and bones. Now I’m stronger and gained enough weight to function well. Would be a bit odd to starve in a country such as this! Anyhow, we picked it up and made our way home, without any stops at the local gas stations.

To close this entry I’d like to type a few words about family. That sounded a bit Mafia when I think about it… Oh well! To me family is of course very important, they’ve always had my back no matter what. It doesn’t matter to them that I’m different, they still love me. My mother, father, everyone. You people have enriched my life and I have no idea where I’d be without you. Heh, I get a bit carried away here, but I mean every word. We all need somebody to lean on, right?